Friends, Demons & Beating Par

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"Anybody who plays golf will tell you that you play against yourself."
~ Martin Sheen

We tend to make life hard on ourselves don't we? We complicate things. Rather than take a look at ourselves and what we need to do to improve our life we look at the course, conditions, clubs and competing characters. Whether in business or life we stroll along hitting the same strokes that we have now become familiar with, getting about the same old score as we always do and stopping, every now and again, to congratulate ourselves on a good shot. Then ~ When we stumble occasionally into the rough we... Well we tend to look around everywhere except where we should - within. We all tend to put our lives on auto pilot and never take a moment to break down what we really need to do ~ To Consistently Beat Par. So what do we need to do? To beat par in business, and indeed life, we need to look at:

P = Psychology

We need to get out of our own way. The person who beats us in life and business is always us - period. Whether it be resistance to learning, changing or modifying our behavior - We beat ourselves.

A = Actions

Do we adjust and change our swing, our habits, our follow through and our focus? Do we keep score of ourselves and how the changes we have made to our swing bring better results? Do we constantly strive to perfect, measure and both honestly and truthfully score ourselves?

R = Relationships

We need coaches. We need someone who can watch our swing with a critical eye. No matter how good we think our self appraisal is - it's biased, prejudiced and fraught with rationalizations. We need Friends and Demons. Demons that will hold us accountable to strive, drive and deliver. Demons that will help us deliver on a performance we can be proud of. Naturally, we need friends to enjoy that performance with.

Business and Life Is All About Beating PAR ~ Enjoy It.

The Finest Man I Knew

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"Excellence is doing ordinary things extraordinarily well."
~ John W. Gardner

Have you ever been truly humbled by a fellow human being? I don't mean impressed or stood in admiration of - but truly humbled? As a child I grew up reading works of Tennyson and Kipling - The Charge of The Light Brigade, If and Gunga Din made an indelible impression on this young mind. So I suppose it was inevitable that when the time came to serve with Quiet Professionals in the United States Army I would be swayed by the notions of honor, duty and courage in the face of daunting adversity. It was then, many years ago, that a wet nosed ego met his marvelous mentor. Let's call him 'Stevie' to protect his wishes. Stevie was a teacher of men. He was a quiet professional. You'd never find him on facebook or twitter. For Stevie lived by a code that rejected self promotion. His was a selfless path. The job, the quality of the end product - the men he molded spoke to his success. His wife knew. His children knew. The men whose lives he saved knew what kind of man he was. The finest man I ever knew? Well ~ "e put me safe inside, an just before 'e died..." Stevie taught me "Tain't what you do - but how you do it. That makes this life worth goin' through it." But go ahead - keep tweetin' and keep posting away but when all is said and done - We must do our job and do it well - 'cause we've all come across people like Stevie and ~ "We will meet 'em later on - in a place where they have gone". And they will know how well we've done.

Tiger Blood.

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"By blood a king, in heart a clown". ~ Alfred Lord Tennyson.

Some people think they have "Tiger Blood" and others really do. How can you tell the difference? When evaluating anyone for possible promotion, additional responsibility, to employ, or work with ~ I've found a very simple acronym works for me. The acronym is P.A.W.  Oftentimes this acronym will tell you whether they really do have tiger blood. But don't be fooled, one component is nice, two is even better, but all three means you've got someone with real tiger blood.

How do you know? ~ Take a look at their PAW.

P = Performance 

A = Attitude 

W = Work Ethic 





Many claim to have Tiger blood - Few Do.

Leadership & Likeability.

"I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody." ~ Bill Cosby.

Think about the leaders you respect the most. Whether from history, business, or personal experience. Were they like-able? I'm not talking about the idiosyncrasies of personality - everyone has those. I'm not talking about those jerks who callously disregard the human equation.

I'm simply asking "Were they like-able?" We can all agree upon the common denominators of like-ability ~ People who listen, care, are selfless, giving and amusing, tend to do well on the like-ability scale.

People who do what we want, when we want, and accept us unconditionally are very like-able. People that don't judge us ~ or hold us accountable to their unreasonable standards are usually like-able.

We like people like us ~ and people who like us.

Are the greatest leaders we know like-able? Is it necessary for us to like them? I've known and worked with some great leaders, in both business and the military, over the years, and from my perspective likability was always a bonus - respect, however, was a necessity.

Me? ~ I tend to like those I respect ~ even when I don't like them.

But then again ~ I guess it all depends on what you like.

The 5 KPI's of Life

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"Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile." ~ Albert Einstein

Key Performance Indicators (KPI's) drive performance.  Best business practices dictate that we continually measure what we manage and constantly strive to improve Products, People and Profits with an unrelenting focus. In business we attempt to ascribe metrics to improving these because we need to substantiate and quantify how well we are doing. That's good and that's how we measure growth.

But what about the KPI's of life?

What about the key performance indicators of life that are more difficult to measure? What are they and how do we know how well we did each day? I humbly submit there are five questions we should ask ourselves.

• Did I Make A Difference?

• Did I Selflessly Give?

• Did I Accept Responsibility?

• Did I Care Enough?

• Did I Do Enough?

Life Is Like A Cup Of Coffee

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"A man sooner or later discovers that he is the master-gardener of his soul, the director of his life." ~ James Allen

10 Things All Leaders Need

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"Leaders don't create followers, they create more leaders."
~ Tom Peters

So You're A Leader. You have an ego the size of Mount Rushmore. You have the unshakable belief that you can make a difference. You're cursed with the disease that others call pathological optimism and you possess a drive and determination that would make Vince Lombardi proud. What else do you need? You might also need A...

• Vision ~ That drives you and inspires others.

• Dog ~ 'Cause you're gonna need a friend.

• Cat ~ To teach you what it's like to be ignored.

• Customer List ~ To keep in touch with who you work for.

• Prospect List ~ To communicate & refine your value proposition.

• Mentor ~ Because their hindsight will give you foresight.

• Sage ~ A wise friend. Because two heads are better than one.

• Sarge ~ You need a drill sergeant to kick your ass now & again.

• Successor ~ Don't be arrogant. Replace yourself.

• Sense of Humor ~ To remind you that "This too shall pass".